just another meatless monday (oh way oh)

a lot of people ask me, "hey alison, what is your favorite way to cook a steak?"  "got any tasty pork recipes?" "got any kick-ass tips for meat on a stick?"  jk.  NO ONE ASKS ME THAT.  you know why? because the only meat in my house on a daily basis is chicken, tuna, hot dogs, or rando pizza toppings on leftovers (and of course, the meat on mah bones.)

couple reasons why i (we) don't have red meat in my (our) house:

a) it intimidates me.  i'm good with birds.  i'm good with fish.  i dare you to microwave a better hot dog.  red meat just costs too much in comparison for me to just screw it up.  so, unless i win a meat sweepstakes or a haen's truck tips over on the highway, that's just the way it is.  (btw, i also am i dynamo with fruits and veggies and legumes...keep that in mind)

b) is red meat bad for you? is it good for you?  it's like the damn egg and sodium.  health professionals just can't make up their minds on the subject. (note: i didn't do any reasearch but i'm pretty sure that's what's up.)

let me make it clear that i do not hate on the carnivores.  i love carnivores.  my husband?  dude is a carnivore.  he's a cheap carnivore so that's why he goes without "pricey" red meat.  he leaves that to the professionals at mc donald's (hollah mc doubles)

but woman (and man) can not live on chicken and tuna and hotdogs (and diet coke) alone.  that's why, i employ lots of vegetables in my house.  yes, i loves the rabbit food.

and anyway, here's a recipe for a tasty burger made with no meat (because, remember, i'm a dynamo with fruits and veggies and legumes in addition to cereal and hot dogs.)

southwest black bean burgers

 (adapted from some dude's recipe on sparkpeople.com)

1 can black beans, drained and rinsed

1 can garbanzo beans (chickpeas), drained and rinsed

3/4 cup brown rice (cooked)

1/2 cup whole wheat flour

1 jalapeno, minced, seeds removed (hey, i used a small can of diced green chilles)

2 cloves garlic, minced (mincing is a pain and a good way to use a finger...get a garlic press)

small handful of cilantro, chopped (i'll say this is optional because i didn't use it) 1/2 a red onion, minced

1/2 cup green onions (scallions), chopped (again, i say, optional)

1 tsp cumin 1 tbsp olive oil lime juice from 1/2 a lime (remember the broke ass burro drink recipe i made? i didn't have a lime so i used that) sea salt to taste, black pepper to taste, and a pinch of cayenne

*cook brown rice according to directions; set aside

*sautee red onion and garlic in oil for a few minutes

*while the onions/garlic are cooking, add all of the rest of the burger ingredients listed above into a bowl. add in the onions/garlic when they’ve been cooking long enough to look translucent and tender.

 *mix all ingredients together well. take 1/2 of the burger mixture and put it into a blender or food processor or if you're me, MAGIC BULLET (love that thing) blend until fairly smooth. leave the other 1/2 chunky.  next, blend the chunky and the smooth portions together in a bowl. ok, this will not look appetizing.  it's a really appalling grey but i assure you, it gets better. make a patty with about 1/3 cup of the mixture.

 if your mixture seems too moist to create a patty, add more whole wheat flour or rice. if it is too dry, add a little water OR more lime juice or margarita. cook in pan until brown on both sides (which, i will tell you is super tricky so start off on medium-low heat and you'll figure it out)

serve on whole wheat buns.  i offered avocado, tomato, and red onion slices as fixin's for the burger.  i also used light mayo and a little bit of Arizona Heat mustard by Koop's

oh, and i guess our friend pepperjack cheese and spicy cole slaw made it to the party as well...i kinda forgot...we had this for dinner like months ago and now i'm jonsin' again

not your mom's rabbit food, yo.